So, you got a date with that lovely lady you have been chatting up online. This alone is a reason to celebrate, but how to move from this first date to a second, third, or tenth? Avoiding the common mistakes below will improve your chances.
Forcing Your Tastes on Her
Her dating site profile surely has a wealth of information on her hobbies, interests, and dislikes. Glance over it another time before making your date plans. Best not to take that vegetarian to your favorite steak restaurant, no matter how impressive you think it is. Her listed hobbies involve reading and watching movies. A date at a quiet, cozy coffeehouse would be far preferable to a night at a rowdy sports pub. Just because you find something to be fun doesn’t mean that she will, and planning a date that makes all involved happy is common courtesy. It will also net you more points in the long run than trying to force-feed her slab of meat.
Grooming, Particularly a Lack Thereof
You wouldn’t arrive at a job interview in a beer-stained shirt and reeking of body odor. Try to extend the same consideration to your date, who almost certainly has her own grooming act put together. You need not show up at her doorstep in a full tuxedo, but simple little things go far: shower, brush your teeth, put on deodorant or maybe some cologne (don’t overdo this part – too thick a musk and she won’t be able to get within a meter of you without gagging. Though, this will also happen if you forgot the earlier advice regarding showering.). Comb your hair. Put on clean, unwrinkled clothes, and dress for the occasion as well as the location. Jeans don’t suit a nice restaurant. If it’s cold out, dress warmly, bring your jacket, and be prepared to offer it to your date if she’s without. Even if she declines the offer, she will appreciate it.
Getting too Friendly, too Fast
Let’s just get this out of the way first: no matter what you think her outfit is implying, the majority of women do not enjoy leering looks, racy comments, or unsolicited physical contact – and failure to respect her wishes will bring the date to a speedy end and maybe a drink thrown in your face. A quick guide: offering your hand when strolling down the road is acceptable. Bellowing like a bear and plunging your face into her rack when she opens the door is not. All that lies between is a gray area that should be navigated by erring on the side of courtesy and caution.
But, the mistake of getting too familiar is not simply limited to sex matters – even if you’re looking for a long-term relationship, keep the first-date conversation light. There’s no need to ask her about how many children she wants, or to weep about the tragic end your last relationship came to, or to talk about how close you are with your mother and how she’d love to meet your date soon. This is only a first date, and coming on like a clingy, affection-starved maniac will send her running for the door.
The Short List of Taboo Conversation Topics
For a first date, just avoid the following conversation topics: Sex, exes, politics and money. Stick to safe topics like hobbies and shared interests.
Keep the above tips in mind, and she’s certain to remember you fondly enough to agree to a second date, as well as many more.