Sexting is the go to flirting technique in the modern world. If they were redesigning the base system, sexting would be the stroll between third base and a home run; fun, exciting, and very close to the real thing. However, when things aren’t going right, it can feel like you’ll never get to your actual goal. Don’t stress; there won’t be a person in the UK who won’t be good at sexting after reading these few pointers.

The 5 Dos

“Text her good stuff that she likes”

1. Start sexting before you’re aroused. Sexting is a long term activity, and you should keep that in mind when you’re planning out your session. Trying to get the goods right away will just make you seem clumsy and pushy over text. Give yourself time to take it slow.

2. Practice your dirty talk, and your flirty dirty talk. Ask her if she’s wet. Give her the idea that the thought of her being turned on turns you on, and she’ll start providing more detail to help you imagine it.

3. Work yourselves up to sending nudes. This should be part of the culmination of sexting, not the starting point. It will be a lot more satisfying to see her breasts or pussy if you work for it, just like it is in real life.

4. Take your time and pay attention while responding. Don’t walk away from the phone to make yourself a sandwich mid conversation, but make sure that you’re giving her plenty to respond to. Be generous with the details here. They’re only words, so acknowledge that you don’t have to follow through on any of these things and then tell her all the great, high energy stuff she loves.

5. Sext out fantasies that you’d like to try in real life. This is a great way to test the waters for introducing a woman to your kinks. See how she reacts to things getting a little rough in the fantasy world. If she likes it, then you can ask about making some of your fantasies reality.

The 3 Big Don’ts

“Do not start dirty talk right away”

1. Don’t open with a dick pic. Even your girlfriend will probably be more put off than aroused if she answers a random text message and sees a dick staring her in the face. That’s also not the kind of thing you want on her phone if she’s out in public.

2. Don’t use emoticons or symbols while sexting. Instead of using a bunch of symbols to represent a dick going into a pussy, use your words to tell her all the ways you’re going to make her squeal.

3. Don’t break the mood by texting her again and again. If it’s taking her awhile to respond, let it. She might be trying to think of a suitably sexy reply, and if you follow up a steamy message with “Hello?” or “Get that?” two minutes later, you could break her concentration. Let it happen as it happens.

These tips cover the basics of sexting, and help you avoid the three biggest pitfalls men get into when they try it. From here, you’ll have to develop your own codes and habits. Remember, practice makes perfect, so don’t hold back: sexting is a modern, convenient way to build your skills and live your fantasies.